Medically reviewed by Kristin Hall, FNP
Written by Our Editorial Team
Last updated 9/30/2022
At this point, we are probably all aware of the debate over whether the female G-spot -- an area in the vagina that’s said to be extra orgasmic -- even exists, with some extolling its erotic virtues and others declaring it to be an anatomical unicorn.
But what might come as a surprise is that many men think they have a special spot of their own which, much like G-spot stimulation in women, may drive us crazy: the P-spot.
In some ways, the P-spot is less controversial than its more well-known sister, as everyone not only agrees that it exists, but that it is, in fact, the prostate gland.
The questions that remain are personal ones. Does prostate stimulation add to sexual pleasure for men? Is there any difference between prostate orgasms and penile orgasms? And finally, are prostate-induced orgasms really what we’ve all been missing out on?
Everyone can answer these questions for themselves, but many men likely have questions and concerns about incorporating the P-spot into their sex life. Part of this is because doing so tends to involve butt play of some kind -- something not all of us are totally comfortable with.
Below, we’ve explained everything you need to know about your P-spot, or G-spot for men, from where it’s located to how you can incorporate it into sex for a more pleasurable experience.
The prostate gland is a walnut-sized gland that sits under your bladder, surrounding the top part of your urethra (the tube that takes urine out of the penis). It produces much of the seminal fluid that makes up ejaculate, or semen.
The prostate gland swells during male sexual arousal, and many men find that putting direct or indirect pressure on it during sex creates a pleasurable sensation deep in their bodies that can lead to more powerful and intense orgasms.
This pleasurable sensation is likely due to the large number of nerve endings found throughout your prostate gland.
“P-spot” and “male G-spot” are two different terms that are used to refer to the same thing: your prostate gland. In this case, the “P” in P-spot is short for prostate -- the small gland that’s found under your bladder.
So, where is the male G-spot? Unlike your penis and testes, your G-spot, or P-spot, is situated inside your body. It sits above the muscles that make up your pelvic floor, approximately in line with the upper side of your penis.
You can feel your P-spot by gently pushing against your perineum (the area between your anus and scrotum).
There are several ways to put pressure on your prostate gland. These include stimulating your prostate gland from the outside of your body by gently pushing against your perineum, or more directly stimulating your prostate gland through prostate massage.
Stimulating your prostate gland from the outside usually creates a mild sensation that, for many men, produces sexual pleasure. You can do this by using one or more fingers to rub against the perineum and increase prostate stimulation.
Many men find that pushing against the anus without any penetration (for example, just pushing from the outside) also stimulates the male G-spot location indirectly.
A more direct way to stimulate your male G-spot is by using self prostate massage. You can do this manually by using one or more of your fingers to press against your prostate gland from the inside of your anus, or by using a prostate massage device.
Many prostate massagers target your prostate gland from the inside and outside of your body to deliver stimulation from multiple angles.
If you don’t feel comfortable stimulating your prostate gland yourself, or using a device to reach it for you, you can ask your partner to gently press on the inside wall of your anus to target your prostate gland for you.
The G-spot for men is located about one inch inside the top wall of your anus, meaning it tends to be easy to reach using a finger movement similar to ringing a doorbell.
A lot of biological men of all gender identities and sexual orientations do find direct and indirect pressure on their prostate to be really pleasurable.
Some apprehension is understandable because anal penetration remains taboo, especially for many heterosexual men. Prostate massage isn’t necessarily for everyone, and there’s nothing wrong with not wanting to give this type of thing a try.
You should never do anything that you don’t want to. But if you’re interested in giving it a try, or possibly optimizing your sexual function, you may want to talk to your partner openly about this type of sexual stimulation.
If you do decide to try stimulating your G-spot, it’s best to take it slow. Don’t try to find the male G-spot on your first anal expedition. Instead, let your partner touch your anus from the outside, preferably using as little pressure as possible.
If it feels good, maybe ask them to insert their finger just a tiny little bit, then escalate based on how you feel together. Alternatively, you might want to try experimenting on your own while you masturbate, then share your discoveries with your partner later.
Either way, it’s important to always do what’s best for you and your partner. Sex is supposed to be fun, intimate and beautiful, not stressful and anxiety-inducing. Take it slow and only proceed if and when you feel comfortable so that you can enjoy the experience, not stress about it.
So, you’re ready to try stimulating your prostate. Great, but there are a few things that you may want to do before engaging in any kind of butt play, including stimulating your prostate or letting your partner do it for you.
First, it’s important to get your anus and rectum as clean as possible before you engage in any kind of butt play, including prostate massage or drainage.
You’re least likely to come in contact with any feces if you’ve already gone to the bathroom that day, since poop only comes into your rectum when it’s on the way out.
So, take a shower -- or better yet, prepare a nice warm bath, because that can help to relax the muscles inside your rectum as well.
If you’re doing this alone, it’s also important to check on your fingers. You want your nails to be short and not at all sharp, because the skin inside your anus is very delicate. Wash your hands to make sure you’re not introducing any germs or other unwanted substances into your anus.
And, check for any cuts on your fingers. Even after a nice soak in the tub, there will still be some germs in your rectum. Obviously, if your partner is the one inserting their fingers, any manicuring tasks fall on them.
If you or your partner are still feeling a little squeamish, you can use latex gloves (or, if you have a latex allergy, the non-latex version) that health care providers use, or try finger cots (which are essentially adorable little condoms just big enough for your finger).
Both of these are sold at most drug stores and provide an extra degree of protection for you and your partner.
You should also invest in some high-quality lubricant. Unlike the vagina, your anus isn’t capable of lubricating itself when you get sexually aroused, meaning there’s a greater risk of injury when you insert a finger, butt plug or other type of sex toy.
The surface of your anus is also extremely sensitive to touch, meaning lube will both protect you from injury and make the process of inserting anything much easier.
Where is a man’s G-spot? The prostate gland swells when you feel sexually aroused, meaning it generally isn’t too difficult to find if you’ve spent a little bit of time preparing yourself with foreplay or masturbation.
Start by putting some lube on your fingers and carefully massaging the outside of the anus, then gradually slip one or two fingers inside.
To find your P-spot, your fingers should be pointing up (toward the belly button). Try to curl them a little bit, like you’re making the universal signal for “come here.” Like we said earlier, you might feel the prostate gland as a small bump similar in size and shape to a walnut.
Many men say that the first thing they notice when someone pushes on their P-spot is a feeling like they have to pee. This makes sense, because the prostate is close to your bladder.
If you notice that you feel like you need to urinate, take it as a sign that you’re in the right place and either keep applying gentle pressure or start massaging your prostate gland.
Whether you’ve found your P-spot and really like what happened next, or you’re simply curious or actively looking, there are a few things you can do to incorporate prostate massage into your regular sex life.
One good option is to continue using fingers (either yours or your partners). After all, you always have them available, and they’re often the best tools for the job.
Experiment until you find the best spot, the optimal amount of pressure, and the perfect moment for prostate stimulation. Maybe it’s just as you’re getting turned on, or maybe you’d rather save it for a moment before you’re about to reach orgasm and ejaculate.
With a little creativity and flexibility, you can combine this fingering with a number of other sexual activities, from masturbation to blow jobs to penis-in-vagina sex.
If you find that P-spot sex is your new favorite thing, you may want to invest in some sex toys for the bedroom such as anal beads, anal vibrators, butt plugs or strap-ons.
Just remember that not everything is appropriate for anal penetration. Some objects, particularly anything that’s thin or small, can potentially get lost inside your anus, requiring an uncomfortable and embarrassing trip to the emergency room for removal.
To keep yourself safe, stick to toys that are designed specifically for anal play, preferably with a wide base that will prevent them from moving too far up your rectum.
No one is debating whether the prostate exists, but whether it can work as an orgasm-inducing pleasure zone is mostly a matter of personal opinion.
If you’re up for some exploration, great. If it sets your world on fire, that’s fantastic; keep finding new ways to stimulate your P-spot. But don’t feel bad if you try it and don’t really enjoy it. Some men find prostate massages to be boring, or even irritating, and that’s okay too.
Interested in finding out more about how you can improve your sexual health, performance and pleasure? In addition to learning how to find your G-spot, there are several other ways to enjoy more satisfying, pleasurable sex.
These include treating issues such as erectile dysfunction (ED) and premature ejaculation (PE), as well as communicating clearly with your partner to overcome common issues such as sexual performance anxiety.
You can also learn more about improving your sexual experience in our detailed guide to how to last longer in bed.